Unsure

I don't really know what to do. I don't know how to help my friends.

They've just lost someone who meant so much to them, and I know they're hurting. I want to help them, make them feel better, and offer a comforting word, but I just don't know how or what to say.

Comforting people does not come easily to me. I wish it did. I wish I could take away some of their pain and hurting...

Ramblings

To those of you who used to say, "I don't get Tumbr. All it is is pictures," I ask: What the hell do you think Pinterest is?

Sorry, I was just thinking about that. And really. People these days are hypocrites.

I've been doing Biology for four hours. I'd like to shoot myself. Grr.

Today, I bought a few things for cake decorating. I got an icing spatula, a decorating bag, and a cupcake swirl tip because I'm sure you were dying to know that.


I've joined drama club this year and by that I mean being in it, not backstage. I'm really liking it because A) It's fun and B) I feel more like a part of the group. My friends have always been my friends, but I feel a little more included now. Plus, I've met a lot of great people because of it.

That's all. :)

Writing Cap

I've lost it. I've lost my writing cap. Me thinks I need to find it ASAP and get back to one of my favorite hobbies. The problem? Writing is hard! As much as I love it, I always run into problems. How am I ever supposed to get published if I don't actually write anything...?

Independence Day

The fourth of July is a bit like Valentine's day to me. If I'm single, it sucks. Well, Valentine's day kind of sucks no matter what...but, not the point. I know it may seem weird to put fourth of July with an adjective like depressing, but I am. 

I've always wanted to be in a relationship on the fourth. I think it'd be nice to have someone to watch fireworks with. Don't get me wrong, watching them with your friends is cool too, but it's not the same. It sucks being single. I look around at all these couples...and I can't help but think "What's wrong with me? Am I just not good enough?"

Alright. I think that's enough moping for one night. 

P!nk Says It All

"Everyday I fight a war against the mirror. I can't take the person staring back at me...I wanna be somebody else."

Afterthought

When it comes to my family, I'm the odd one out. On my dad's side, everyone is really carefree and they joke around a lot. That should sound awesome, but I don't know how to be that way. And then my mom's side (the side this is mainly about) is very intellectual, which is great! I love that! Except...all my cousins are either way other than me, or way younger. There is no one my age. I went to my 2nd cousin's grad party today. She's my age, but she also lives in Wisconsin. I see her and her brother maybe once every ten years. So, what did I do at a party where I barely knew anyone? Nothing. I did absolutely nothing. I didn't skate (it was at a roller rink). I didn't eat. I didn't talk. I only talked when I was asked a question. And time just goes by so fast! I mean, I found out one of my second cousin's is now 20! I thought he was only a year older than me! Not to mention the other second cousin I have (that I actually forgot I had) who's know nine or so. When I finally realized who she was, I remembered holding her as a baby when I was ten. TEN! I don't even know. I like my family. I do. But...I feel like the black sheep. And I think they think it too. I mean, my own parents have the time treat me as if I don't exist as family things. It's all Val this and Val that. I love my sister, but seriously! You have another child! One who's sitting right next to you staring at her shoes trying to blend in. When my sister's around, everyone talks about her. When she's not around, everyone talks about her.

Me? I'm just an afterthought.

Oh, buddy...

I'm really starting to regret my blog title. I mean, sure, I did make it when I was in like...eighth grade, but still. I wish I could change it.

This summer has been a bore fest. I've saw my friends once, and it was for about a half hour. I sincerely hope this gets better because I won't last.

Wow...I really shouldn't post things when I have nothing to say. It's incredibly boring.

HEY! Wait! There is a man. He goes by the name of Andrew Allen. He is amazing. Saw him in concert a year ago. I suggest you go and Google his song "Sooner." It will turn your heart to mush.

Yeah...

I should probably update this more, but what is there really to say? I don't want to treat my blog like a journal because I'd just be repeating what I've already put in my journal...

 So...Uh, tomorrow's my last day of my junior year! That's pretty exciting! Then I'll be a senior! That feels so crazy to say. A senior. Really?! It seems like just yesterday I was in first grade, getting in trouble for leaving the room without asking.As weird and bittersweet as it is, I am happy that I'm almost done with high school. I'm so looking forward to college. Being at graduation yesterday was a bit of a reality check. I just kept thinking next year that will be me...and all my friends graduating this year will be gone, and I won't see them very much if at all.

This next year is going to be one wild ride. College applications. Scholarship applications. Saying goodbye to my friends... Something my principal said at graduation yesterday really hit me hard, "You'll go away and make new friends." But...what if I don't want to make new friends. I want the friends I have now. What sucks is that I know most high school friendships don't last throughout life. I hope and pray that doesn't happen with our little group because I love them too much to say goodbye.

"An Apple Red as Blood"

Before I start talking about this week's Once Upon a Time episode, I just have to say...the whole August Booth being Pinocchio doesn't really make much sense. They should have cast a better match to play his younger self. The young Pinocchio was a ginger...August is a brunette.

I loved tonight's episode. Regina, I hate you. Henry, bravo. Doing whatever possible to get Emma to believe. Although, I'm super worried for Henry's safety. I'm so glad they brought the Mad Hatter back! Sebastian Stan, you make a very sexy brooding man. I'm still super excited for the Season Finale (as well as super sad) because I heard Graham is making an appearance! I could be wrong, but if I read the TV Guide correctly, he'll be back for at least another episode!

I won't lie. Regina thinking of putting the poison apple into a turnover was pretty clever, but then again, if I were  Emma I don't think I'd eat anything that woman gave me truce or no truce. Sometimes I really want to shake the crap out of Emma, even though if I were put in the same situation...I'd think everyone was crazy too. BUT, just think how cool it would be to be a fairy tale character! It'd be pretty sweet. I think I'd be Belle... :)



PS:
I just checked IMDB for next week's episode to see who'll be in it. Jamie Dornan's name is on the list! So, unless the DataBase is messing with me, Graham will be on the season finale! :D

Prom Twenty Twelve

Prom was...interesting. I don't know if I had an idea of what prom was supposed to be likes in my head, but I doubt that was it. First and foremost, grinding your butt up against your boyfriend is NOT dancing. It's slutty, inappropriate, and just plain disgusting. I really wish I could forget some of the things I saw (one couple in particular. My friends will understand who I mean). Seriously, the behavior I saw last night is the reason there is a "prom baby" stigma. I still don't understand why it wasn't stopped. Half the time my group of friends were the only ones dancing face to face, and sometimes that wasn't even the case...

               This wasn't the rant I expected to be...probably because I've slept since..well, this morning, but last night I thought this post would be ridiculously ranty...but it seems I've lost some of my disgusted-ness. Maybe I've just come to remember that this was a Lewis Cass Prom, so I probably shouldn't have been so surprised. 

The saddest part of the night was taking down my hair... I miss that hairstyle already. :(

People Just Don't Understand

Whenever people see my report cards, they get that look on their face. You know, the one where they look like their happy for you, but at same time want to beat your face in? Recently, I haven't been doing so hot in chemistry II, and I currently have an 82% in the class. I've been beating myself up over it. My teachers, my friends, and my brain have tried to convince myself not to think too much about it. It is the beginning of the six weeks. I do have plenty of time to bring it back up. Plus, it's only a B (given it's a low B, but a B nonetheless).

BUT...what if I don't get it back to an A. This entire year I've had nothing but A's, and I can't afford to have anything but.

Here's where the title comes into play.


My friends. My parents. My teachers. They don't understand. My grades are me. I am my grades. My value for a college is my academic achievements. I'm not the most active person in after school activities. If I don't have my good grades...what do I have? Nothing. If my grades don't stand out, my life...my future will go nowhere.

Something You May Not Know

I like to dance. Am I good at it? Heck, no. I probably have the worst dancing of all time, but I still like to do it when I'm by myself. I'm normally embarrassed at myself when I do. :P

Whoa, Blogger!

Hello, beautiful!

Hopped on Blogger this afternoon only to find a completely revamped layout! If you use Blogger, you'll understand what I mean. It's like the website has finally done something interesting.

Anyways... I'm trying to find a hairstyle for Prom and honestly, it's going horribly. I can't do much with my hair, which makes this search seem futile. Maybe I should shave it right before prom. I think I'd be the talk of the night.

"Hat Trick"

Tonight's Once Upon A Time was...AMAZING! And this is coming from the girl who hates Alice In Wonderland. The movie always gave me the heeby-jeebes. The way the show gives the back stories for these fairy tale characters is awesome. I really liked how they showed how the Mad Hatter became Mad. His story was so...sad :(

My love for this episode may have had something to do with who they chose to play the Mad Hatter. The man is so sexy! Sorry for my bluntness, but the first time he came on screen, I was just like "oh, my..." I may have drooled a little. Okay, maybe that's a bit of a hyperbole, but you get my point. Sebastian Stan I guess is his real name, and I do hope he appears in more episodes.

Regina is getting on my nerves. How much evil can be in one person?

Breaking Dawn: Part One

I used to be obsessed with the Twilight Saga. I read the book in eighth grade and fell in love with them. Now that I'm a little older, I realize that they were pretty dumb books. I mean, the heroine is a complete wimp who stands by and lets her boyfriend do everything...

Anyways after the third movie, I pretty much lost interest. The first movie was God-awful. And from there the movies kind of improved as they went on. Breaking Dawn Part One follows this trend.

Honestly, my favorite part of the movies is Billy Burke, or whatever his name is...the guy who plays Officer Swan. He always has these funny, witty lines that make me laugh.

I also really like the music selection (except Bella's Lullaby.. it sucks). But the music includes bands like Muse and Iron and Wine, and for that, I approve.

The wedding scene was also pretty good. As well as the part near the end where Edward's venom is taking effect and they show her hair getting brighter and nasty, anorexic body plumping back out (that is not me saying Kristen Stewart is fat though).

I didn't really like how they did the wolf pack connection though. When the pack is in wolf form and they can hear each others thoughts...yeah, they did that horribly.

And yeah, overall it didn't suck nearly as bad as I thought it was. Kristen was actually showing some emotion in this film. Surprise, surprise.

Cassandra Clare

If you’re looking for a good book to read, look no further. I can provide you with six books that will blow your mind. “Six?” You may ask, “How is that even possible?” Well, it’s very possible due to an amazing woman by the name of Cassandra Clare. This woman has captured my heart through the two series she authors. The Mortal Instruments and the Infernal Devices are the books that have so readily changed my mind on certain fiction genres. You may say, “That’s a little extreme, Darci.” No, not really. If you’ve read them, you’ll understand why.

Both book series are woven together to form one big series. Does that make any sense? I honestly have a difficult time describing their relationship myself. Their connection is just so convoluted that explaining them to anyone would be too time consuming to attempt. I guess that means, everyone will just have to read them for themselves, which is what this article is trying to persuade you to do anyway…You feel it, don’t you? You’re feeling a magnetic force pulling you to the library.

I ran into these books last year; I took one look at them and tossed them into my “not in a million years” pile. After a couple of months, I finally took the time to read the synopsis. The books appeared to be about Angels and Demons and pretty much anything in between. Intriguing, but not necessarily the sort of thing I would normally read. Obviously I did. The basic concept, without giving the plots away, is that there are a group of highly trained warriors called Shadowhunters (also referred to as Nephilim). These warriors were created by an angel, and they were meant to rid the world of demons. So, the series revolves around Shadowhunters and their adventures, plus some other awesome stuff that you are just going to have to discover by yourself by READING THEM! NOW!

Anyway, I’m sure you’ve realized just how much I love these books. I sincerely hope my excitement has piqued your interest enough to pick them up!

March 23 is Almost Here!

With the Hunger Games release date fast approaching, the trilogy is all we've been talking about. I've been a part of two particular discussions that I'd like to throw my opinion out on.

Gale VS Peeta

A couple of my friends were talking about how much they just love Peeta. While Peeta's a pretty cool guy...I've always been a Gale fan. And here's my reasoning behind this. Katniss has known Gale longer, I mean, they know almost EVERYTHING about each other and have a really close bond. Plus, Gale is a hunter. He can help Katniss hunt and make some wicked traps. Peeta can make bread. Awesome.

Mockingjay

I finally realized I'm not the only one who thinks the ending of Mockingjay sucked! I mean...it was just awful. Great book series with a horrible ending.

Once Upon a Time

I love this show.

Once Upon a Time is probably one of the most original shows on TV today. Writers can only make so many crime shows or cop shows (which I'm sick of seeing, by the way). The actors are amazing!

Ginnifer Goodwin: Such an amazing actress. She plays Snow White perfectly! She can be sweet and innocent, or she can be vengeful. Plus, she is so gorgeous.

Josh Dallas: Personally, I don't think anyone else could have played him. Perhaps its his ridiculously handsome face? But, behind that smokin' exterior is a great actor. (:

Robert Carlyle: RUMPELSTILTSKIN! He was cast perfectly! When I first saw him, I thought he was the creepiest looking guy ever, but the more episodes I watch, the more I like him! He is just...so AMAZING! He makes me laugh, cry, and scream. Any actor that can make you do that has amazing talent.

I'm not going to go through every actor on the show though. All you need to know is that this is one spectacular cast!

Whoever is in charge of wardrobe for OUAT in also equally amazing. Such great clothing.

Thoughts on "Heart of Darkness"

This new episode left me wanting so much more! As heart broken as I am that Graham is gone (because hot freaking Hmm was that boy fine) Snow and Charming's story makes up for it. Every time the two of them kiss, I just want to squee. They're so cute. I think Regina framed Mary Margret by the way... David is making me angry that he's doubting Mary Margret because she's right, she stood by him. The teaser for the next episode intrigues me...even though I completely hate Alice in Wonderland. Although..I was kind of getting a Sweeny Todd feel from it too.

I'm Not Dead, I Swear

I think the reason I have so much trouble with keeping this up to date is school. I write so much that keeping a blog going is exhausting. I only have so many ideas! Between writing essays, research papers, newspaper stories, plus my own fiction stories...I'm sucked dry.

On the flip side, quick update before I start posting blogs with actual topics... The preacher filling today was really great! He made me think a lot, which is not something I like to do on the weekends, especially at nine o'Clock on a Sunday morning... I'm getting my flower beds ready for my daisies! And...yeah. Super stoked for the Hunger Games movie coming out, and here's hoping it's as great as the books, even though it's not possible.