Afterthought

When it comes to my family, I'm the odd one out. On my dad's side, everyone is really carefree and they joke around a lot. That should sound awesome, but I don't know how to be that way. And then my mom's side (the side this is mainly about) is very intellectual, which is great! I love that! Except...all my cousins are either way other than me, or way younger. There is no one my age. I went to my 2nd cousin's grad party today. She's my age, but she also lives in Wisconsin. I see her and her brother maybe once every ten years. So, what did I do at a party where I barely knew anyone? Nothing. I did absolutely nothing. I didn't skate (it was at a roller rink). I didn't eat. I didn't talk. I only talked when I was asked a question. And time just goes by so fast! I mean, I found out one of my second cousin's is now 20! I thought he was only a year older than me! Not to mention the other second cousin I have (that I actually forgot I had) who's know nine or so. When I finally realized who she was, I remembered holding her as a baby when I was ten. TEN! I don't even know. I like my family. I do. But...I feel like the black sheep. And I think they think it too. I mean, my own parents have the time treat me as if I don't exist as family things. It's all Val this and Val that. I love my sister, but seriously! You have another child! One who's sitting right next to you staring at her shoes trying to blend in. When my sister's around, everyone talks about her. When she's not around, everyone talks about her.

Me? I'm just an afterthought.